Regina Barnes
Regina Barnes is an ER physician and the middle child in the Barnes family. History Christmas 1982 At a Christmas party in 1982, Regina was accused of stealing a snow globe from the neighbor, Mrs. Veech. Regina maintained her innocence, even over 20 years later. When Lydia set up to remodel her apartment, where the snow globe had been hidden, the truth came out that Ben and Oliver had stolen it. ("If These Floors Could Talk") Thanksgiving 1998 Oliver brought his then-girlfriend, Sharon, to Thanksgiving in 1998, not knowing that Sharon was also secretly dating his sister. Regina and Sharon were caught kissing in the kitchen, first by Ben and then by Lydia, both of whom were shocked. Regina then came out to her entire family. ("Thanks") Thanksgiving 1999 The following Thanksgiving, Regina and Sharon were still dating, but they had a fight at Thanksgiving dinner and ultimately broke things off. ("Thanks") Thanksgiving 2004 Lydia and Stewart were separated for Thanksgiving 2004, but hadn't yet told the kids, so they pretended to be still married. The kids knew something was up, but they figured that something was wrong with Stewart, since he appeared not to be able to remember things, like where things are located in the kitchen. When he got food on his shirt, Regina suggested he change, but he insisted club soda would take it out. However, a loud pop scared him, causing him to spill wine all over his shirt. Because he no longer had clothes there, he was forced to put on one of Lydia's. He then spilled dip on his pants when Oliver came through the door unexpectedly. Ben then noticed that all of Stewart's things were gone and they figured out that their parents had separated. They thought it would be the last Thanksgiving they all spent together. ("Thanks") Oliver and Regina Setting Ben Up When Ben started to get back into nerdy things with his friends from high school, Oliver and Regina hatched a plan to set him up with women to get him back into the dating scene. Because of their competitive natures, they made a bet over which woman Ben would choose. Regina said she wouldn't make a bet, but Oliver figured out that she had set Ben up with a co-worker and then tried to set his own date up with Ben. They fought and both women left. ("The Truth About Nerds & Dogs") Cooking Class Ben planned to take a cooking class with Oliver, saying that it was the perfect way to meet single women. However, each of them bailed on the class and sent Lydia and Regina in their places. Regina and Lydia were both resistant to staying for the class, but they ultimately went through with it and finally talked about Lydia's feelings about Regina being gay. Lydia admitted that it was uncharted territory for her, but she never stopped wanting what was best for Regina. She just stopped knowing what that was. ("Key Ingredients") Janice Meyers' Wedding Regina, along with the rest of her family, was invited to the wedding of Janice Meyers, whom the family had known since she was a child. Once she arrived at the wedding, Regina learned that one of the bridesmaids had been able to make it, so she was asked to step in as a replacement. She was initially reluctant, but ultimately agreed. Once she got all dressed up and ready, she discovered that she liked it, because she was able to manipulate guys into doing things for her. ("The Wedding") Thanksgiving 2005 Despite them being divorced, Ben suggested that Lydia invited Stewart to Thanksgiving, so the five of them could celebrate together as a family. The three siblings set up an emergency page to get them out of dinner early. Things went south when Oliver accidentally pushed the turkey out the window. They then ordered Chinese food. The man who delivered it accidentally hit the turkey as he biked to them. As he was leaving, he collapsed. They later figured out it was because his wife had forgotten to pick up his blood pressure medication. They got him stable and had him promise to check in with his regular doctor before sending him on his way. After reminiscing about past Thanksgivings that hadn't gone so well, they ignored the emergency page and sat down to have a nice dinner together. ("Thanks") Visiting Maria Maria was the Barnes' housekeeper when the kids were little. For her 80th birthday, Lydia baked her a cake and planned to go visit her in the nursing home. However, Lydia decided to go the following morning and guilted the others into joining her. Stewart and Oliver rode in one car while Ben, Lydia, and Regina rode in the other. While they were driving, Ben hit something and the tire went flat. Lydia asked Regina to change it, but then remembered that she'd had the spare tire taken out to make room for the cake. They then all piled into Stewart's classic car, which he was restoring. However, the only thing he'd done so far was the horn, which he demonstrated. However, he hadn't done a very good job because the horn started honking continuously. It also rained the rest of the way, so when they arrived, they were soaked and upset. Lydia had even lost a shoe through the hole in the floor and the cake had been destroyed. Maria was sleeping when they arrived, so they decided to wait a few minutes rather than waking her up. Ben created a scene in Maria's room when he refused to rub her roommate's feet and then pressed her bed alarm by mistake. The ensuing chaos woke Maria. ("Guilt Trip") Crystal's Poetry Reading After Ben invited Crystal in, Stewart invited all three kids to go to Crystal's poetry reading and then to dinner together. They were all bored out of their minds, but didn't tell Stewart and ended up watching a DVD of her next poetry reading with him. ("Guilt Trip") Christmas 2005 She had to work on Christmas in 2005, which Ben and Oliver say was lucky because she missed having to scarf down two Christmas dinners, first at Lydia's and then at Stewart's, where Crystal got every recipe off a marshmallow bag. Instead, she went to the hospital Christmas party, where Stewart's all-doctor singing group, the Medtones, performed. ("New Year's Eve") New Year's Eve 2005 After a long dry spell for all of them, Ben, Regina, and Oliver decided to throw a huge New Year's party in order to score. They accidentally invited both Lydia and Stewart. Stewart also mistakenly assumed that they would want his all-doctor singing group, The Medtones, to perform. Oliver ended up bribing a nursing home so they wouldn't perform, but they showed up anyway after they were done with the nursing home gig. At the party, Ben began to flirt with a woman named Jennifer. When he got up to answer the door, Oliver stepped in and also flirted with her. When Ben and Oliver went to the kitchen to fight about them, Regina came in and said she had also flirted with Jennifer. After finding out that tequila makes her a wild woman, Regina left to get some after sabotaging Oliver, saying he had a pregnant wife. Oliver faked an injury to get Jennifer to massage his leg. They continued to take turns hitting on Jennifer until she left the party with Jennifer. Regina later came back and was going to brag, but admitted that Jennifer had gone to a bar with her for a drink, but left with another woman and two men from Cirque Du Soleil. Their parents both scored at their party, but they all ended up alone at midnight. During the party, Regina also briefly pretended to be Stewart's date when Crystal's father, who was unaware of their relationship, came as Lydia's date. ("New Year's Eve") Cabin Trip Lydia and Stewart had a week in a cabin, which they decided to split after the divorce. Lydia took the first half of the week with Ben and Stewart the second with Regina and Oliver. Lydia was planning to be out of the cabin before Stewart and Crystal showed up, but they ended up being snowed in. Lydia was shocked that Stewart and Crystal (along with Oliver and Regina, plus Oliver's girlfriend Trisha, were able to make it up to the cabin. Nevertheless, they tried to make the best of it. When Oliver, Ben, and Stewart found a pregnancy test while the ladies were out, they all panicked and speculated over whose test it might be, each of them hoping they weren't the father. Ultimately, it was discovered that the test belonged to Regina, who was thinking about using a sperm donor to become a mom alone and bought the test in case she might need it. ("Yours, Mine or His?") Valentine's Day 2006 Regina didn't have a date for Valentine's Day. She also had to work that day. She ended up treating her own dad, whose back was in spasm because of muscle inflammation. ("Hot Water") Competing with Oliver Oliver joined a new sports club and invited Regina there to play squash with him. When she discovered the amenities at his club, she lost to him in order to get him to keep paying the guest fee for her to come play. Oliver was then confused when he received a bill for multiple services he hadn't used, as Regina used them not knowing that the club charged for every individual thing. She apologized to him for what she'd done, but because she kept losing to him, he thought he was good and put money on a game with the club's pro. ("You Win Some, You Use Some") Being Used by Lydia Lydia wanted an in with Cynthia Boyd, who was supposed to pick a new board member, a seat Lydia wanted. When she found out that Cynthia has a gay son and goes to many Pride events with him, she told Lydia that her daughter is gay and they go to Pride events together, trying to get on Cynthia's good side. Lydia threw a party and had Regina play up the lesbian act. However, Regina figured out what she was doing and pretended to be straight, even hitting on a waiter. Lydia later apologized to Regina for using her like that. ("You Win Some, You Use Some") Doctor of the Year Regina was one of the possibilities for being named a top doctor of the year. She believed it would be her or Lydia and was shocked when it was actually Stewart. ("Doctor of the Year") Uncle Ned's Funeral The whole Barnes family attended the funeral of Ned, Lydia's uncle. After the funeral, Ben and Oliver tricked Regina into taking Frieda, their mom's cousin, back to her hotel. Frieda kept Regina in the ER half the night testing her for several diseases. Regina retaliated by ruining both of their chances with Kathy Kelly, their childhood crush. ("Restaurant Row") IRS Audit Lydia and Stewart were audited for the last year they were married. Their accountant had retired and Regina had convinced them to use her then-girlfriend to do their taxes. Stewart was unable to find the tax returns and ended up avoiding Lydia rather than preparing for the audit. Regina was able to contact Tess, the ex-girlfriend, and get a copy of the return. When Enid Kolodny came to do their audit, everything checked out except that they had claimed Monty as a dependent. Regina dosed the auditor with a medication that knocked her out. When she woke up, she finished the audit quickly and they managed not to get in trouble. ("Losing Patients") Cabin Trip Stewart won a raffle for a weekend at a very nice cabin and planned to take Crystal. However, when he couldn't because of his hernia surgery, Lydia took the key to use with Jack. When they broke up, Oliver took the key to use with Mary. When they ended things, Regina took it to use with Conner. When Conner went back to her ex-boyfriend, Ben tried to use it with Wendy, the nurse he'd been flirting with, but she turned him down after overhearing Oliver say he's crazy. Ben, Oliver, Regina, and Lydia ended up going out there together just the four of them. ("Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And...") Relationships Romantic She has dated women named Lisa, Ruth, Chloe, Sara, Stephanie, Brenda, Joy, Maxine, Lisa (yes, another one), and Tanya. Two of her exes then went on to date each other. ("Yours, Mine or His?") Sharon In 1998, Oliver was dating a woman named Sharon. Unbeknownst to him, she and Regina were also dating. Oliver brought Sharon to Thanksgiving, where the truth came out. Sharon and Regina dated until the following Thanksgiving, when they broke up. While they were dating, Sharon gave Regina diamond earrings which Oliver had given her. ("Thanks") Maxine At one of her mother's parties, Regina got in a fight with her girlfriend, Maxine. They then made up on top of everyone's coats. Latina Girlfriend Regina once broke up with a 6' Latina woman in a Cuban restaurant and advised Ben to do breakups in private because of that. ("The Heartbreak Kid") Jennifer At the New Year's Eve party the three siblings threw, Regina hit on a woman named Jennifer. However, Oliver and Ben were also interested and also hit on her. After passing the buck several times, Jennifer left with Regina, but Regina later admitted that they didn't hook up as Jennifer had left with another woman and two men from Cirque du Soleil. ("New Year's Eve") Beth Regina was dating a woman named Beth, but she realized there was no future, so she slept with her a few more times and broke it off. ("Yours, Mine or His?") Tess Regina dated Tess during the last year her parents were married. When their accountant retired, Regina convinced her parents to use Tess to prepare their taxes for them. Tess is described as very large, like a female linebacker. ("Losing Patients") Candace, Karen, and Marcia Lydia attempted to set Regina up with Candace, Karen, and Marcia. ("Doctors Without Bidders") Carla Munson Lydia wanted to set Carla up with Regina, but she was told that if she did so, Regina would immediately find fault with her and refuse to date her, so instead, she had Oliver hit on her and told her to introduce Carla to Regina when she turned him down. He did so and they began seeing each other. Lydia pretended to dislike Carla in order to keep them together. However, Oliver accidentally revealed the truth. Regina, upset, confronted Lydia, saying she saw what Lydia was talking about, but Carla overheard and left upset. Lydia then went to speak to her, to convince her to give Regina another chance. ("Doctors Without Bidders") Waitress at the Diner Regina went out with one of the waitresses at the diner. When things went south, the waitress treated Regina poorly. ("The Lady Doth Protest Too Much") Conner Regina started seeing Conner, a pharmaceutical sales representative. Conner had recently broken up with Dana, whom Regina assumed to be a woman. However, she found out that Dana was actually a man and that he and Conner had gotten back together. ("Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And...") Jackie and Maxine Regina went out with two women named Jackie and Maxine who later went on to have a baby together. ("Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And...") Familial Regina gets along well with her brothers, Ben and Oliver. They often check out the same women, even sometimes competing over the same women. Lydia Barnes Regina believes that her mother is overly judgmental of her life and her choices. Naomi Regina says Naomi was always pleasant to her, which Oliver claims is because she's a lesbian and, "She couldn't like you more if you were a spotted owl." Oliver Barnes Oliver and Regina are very competitive, usually competing in athletic endeavors and occasionally over the same women. Regina sometimes conspires with Oliver to pick on Ben. ("Doctor of the Year") Ben Barnes Oliver and Regina both tend to pick on Ben for his nerdy tendencies, such as reading comic books. Regina, with Oliver's help, tricked Ben into thinking Jack Arbogast was his biological father, freaking him out. ("Doctor of the Year") Frieda After Uncle Ned's funeral, Regina was tricked into taking her mother's cousin, Frieda, back to her hotel. Frieda, upon finding out that Regina works in the ER, insisted that they make a side trip so she could get tested for multiple conditions. ("Restaurant Row") Friendships Kathy Kelly Regina, like her brothers, had a crush on Kathy Kelly when they were younger. She used to challenge Kathy to wrestle on the beach often. ("Restaurant Row") Career Regina is an ER physician. She delights in grossing out her brother, Ben, with stories of things that happen at work. She once sewed the deputy Mayor's pinky toe back on. ("Doctor of the Year") Notes and Trivia *Mint chocolate chip ice cream is her comfort food. *She once dressed as a dominatrix at one of her mother's parties. ("And I'll Cry If I Want To") *As a child, she once rode a skateboard down a slide. ("The Truth About Nerds & Dogs") *She has a tattoo of the Chinese symbol for dignity on the small of her back. ("Key Ingredients") *She knows how to change a tire. ("Guilt Trip") *She used to pose her Barbies sexually. ("Model Behavior") *She wears contacts. ("You Win Some, You Use Some") Gallery 1x01ReginaBarnes.png|Pilot 1x02ReginaBarnes.png|We Wanna Hold Your Hand 1x03ReginaBarnes.png|And I'll Cry If I Want To 1x04ReginaBarnes.png|The Truth About Nerds & Dogs 1x05ReginaBarnes.png|Brothers Grim 1x06ReginaBarnes.png|The Heartbreak Kid 1x07ReginaBarnes.png|Key Ingredients 1x08ReginaBarnes.png|The Wedding 1x09ReginaBarnes.png|Thanks 1x10ReginaBarnes.png|Guilt Trip 1x11ReginaBarnes.png|New Year's Eve 1x12ReginaBarnes.png|Yours, Mine or His? 1x13ReginaBarnes.png|Model Behavior 1x14ReginaBarnes.png|Hot Water 1x15ReginaBarnes.png|You Win Some, You Use Some 1x16ReginaBarnes.png|Doctor of the Year 1x17ReginaBarnes.png|Restaurant Row 1x18ReginaBarnes.png|Losing Patients 1x19ReginaBarnes.png|Doctors Without Bidders 1x20ReginaBarnes.png|If These Floors Could Talk 1x21ReginaBarnes.png|The Lady Doth Protest Too Much 1x22ReginaBarnes.png|Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And... Appearances Category:Characters Category:Barnes Family